I think the real question is why should a girl shave, preen and diet herself into oblivion for a guy in sweatpants and a t shirt who hasn’t trimmed his pubes in 3 years
Please stop reblogging this I’m scared a social justice warrior is gonna find it and realise I’m a boy
Honestly the fact that a guy says this is really something to me
And by something I mean it’s fucking attractive every other man on the planet should take notes
"didnt you wear those jeans yesterday"
i am pretty much 3% human and 97% stress
according to USA Today, the average tumblr user spends 2.5 hours a month on tumblr
more like 2.5 hours an hour.
i dont think you guys understand how averages work
I’m pretty good at cooking i can make a mean chicken
there’s always that one character where you’re like “tbh I love this character bc I am this character”
This is what happens for real when I can’t find the right words.
Horse Tornado is the only phrase I will use from now on
my brother forgot the word so he said “leg elbow” one time
do you ever try to take your socks off while standing up only to lose your balance and start falling and all you can think is “this is it, i’m going to accidentally kill myself, gonna make front page on the news” but then at the last minute you catch yourself and your body’s all high on adrenaline and suddenly you’re filled with the resolve to live your life to the fullest
My vibe wand tried to kill me yesterday. Did my business, then I got up to go to the bathroom and it fell off the bed and I tripped and went flying. All I could think was what if I hit my head and died and they found me that way, with my vibrator next to me and my foot all tangled in the cord? Would be just my luck to go out like that - not with a bang but with a humiliating buzz.
These are the perils of a single woman living alone. =/